If
asked, I would have said that I was an agnostic leaning towards atheism. It just
didn’t make sense to me that any deity powerful enough to have created the
whole universe (check it out; it is vast beyond comprehension), you name it;
any deity at all, would have any interest in any of my affairs. My favorite atheist was
Christopher Hitchens. He wrote a book titled god is not Great, (caps were his) and in that book he devoted
a chapter titled: the Tawdriness of the Miraculous and the Decline of Hell. The miracles I called out to the heavens that never got answered were prayers of grasping: grasping to get out of trouble, grasping for my health and
grasping to win the Lottery… and so on. Those prayers were selfish and it is
understandable that they went unanswered, but my seemingly unselfish prayers, no
matter how fervent, were met with a cosmic silence. It was only when I
surrendered my will to this mysterious power greater than my own, when I gave up grasping, was I able to slip into the
rhythms and harmony of that cosmic reality… that heart of compassion. The
miracle is that this was what I needed to relieve me of the bondage of my own
grasping. I try to stay there to join in the cosmic dance we call God.
geo, 4,657
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