Depression
stalks most of us at one time or another. It lurks in wait as my mind takes me
around corners into blind alleys of doubt and despair. It is easy to accept
it’s stranglehold on my consciousness until I am no longer of much use to anyone (including myself) and
actually begin to enjoy it. I can even become irate at the suggestion I get off
my ass and do something about it while I wallow in bitterness and contempt for
myself and those who truly love me. In my case, I can seemingly be fulfilled in
every way… with my bills paid; with a loving partner; living in a beautiful
city; having good friends; giving a helping hand to those who need it… I can be
quite successful in hiding my feelings and I can “put on a happy face”… but
still it is there. What then can I do?
The
answer to my dilemma isn’t simple: there are medications and therapies and the
help of sharing these feelings with my spiritual guide. Yet, I have found…
along with an honest inventory… I can ask the Heart of Compassion for help and
trust that help will come. This morning I felt like avoiding my meditation but
it is a habit I have developed that has become automatic. Still, I approached my
cushion, as though I was being executed... taken to the chopping block; before I sat, I simply made a
quiet and honest request: “Please help me. I don’t want to do this.”
Regardless, I began my usual preparations, a calm
came over me and love for that beautiful creative force arose in my heart once
more. It was in this place that my mind was quieted and was lifted from the
disease of alcoholism. It was this source that has on countless times called me
to move with compassion for myself as well as for others. It is this source that I abide in when all else fails.
Sometimes it is this
easy.
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