The Gap (Rigpa)

In the ordinary mind, we perceive the stream of thoughts as continuous, but in reality this is not the case. You will discover for yourself that there is a gap between each thought. When the past thought is past, and the future thought is not yet action, you will always find a gap in which the Rigpa, the nature of mind, is revealed. So the work of meditation is to allow thoughts to slow down, to make that gap become more and more apparent.

Glimpse After Glimpse

Sogyal Rinpoche

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When I adventured into meditation and followed these instructions, my first thought was, “What does this have  to do with the Eleventh Step, or making conscious contact with God, if that gap between thoughts is just a gap?” My hope was that it was there that “it” would happen. I had no idea what “it” was but I wanted it. 

   Eventually I let go of hoping for “it”. Letting go of hope for something big to happen… a flash of light from the clouds… a vision of heavenly angels circling the spheres or something like that… just breathe. Between thoughts is Rigpa. Between breaths is Rigpa. Between heartbeats is Rigpa. The universe has a pulse. That pulse that is a rhythm calling for a dance like a Philip Glass composition; an Alan Ginsberg rant; a Jack Kerouac wild arrangement of words that are read like a Jackson Pollack splattering of paint; or a Ravi Shankar jazzy Raga. No, nothing big happens: just a subtle joy… a subtle joy that dances with the atoms of discovery… the little bang to the Big Bang… galaxies and mysteries… all there with a gap between beats… the same gap as the gap between thoughts. God is there alright… in the midst of it like a conductor in the midst of the universal orchestra; surrounded and surrounding all and in everything… magically waving a wand.

    So, what happens… what can I expect by not expecting? I get up off my cushion and walk away with a touch of “it” in my day, a touch I never felt or saw, but my heart quietly brims with gratitude and gratitude spins around into compassion that is the end and all of “it”. It is the Heart of Compassion. Truly, a heart brimming with gratitude has no room for vain conceits.

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