This morning I heard a Gospel song on the radio with
this verse:
Lord,
you don’t have to move
the mountain…
But
grant me the strength to climb.
Lord,
you don’t have to remove
my stumbling blocks
Just
lead me around…
The
song struck me as a deeply sourced revelation. It came from a vast accumulation
of honest reflection. The idea that we have ceased fighting everything would
appear to be an evasion of our problems and certainly no way for anyone with
any true-grit to face them. We have this notion that we must confront and fight
to the death against the obstacles in front of us and that we are either for or
against them (prohibition against drinking, anti-smoking, a war on drugs or pro this or that and so on). I can laugh at my self-righteousness now because I realize I knew more about what I was against than what I was for beyond my self-centered vices or demands. This attitude might have helped me to succeed in many ventures, and might have even impressed some others, but, in the end, drove me into a false perception of self I couldn't live up to.
Extending such bravado to the image I presented to those around me became a
greater priority than the truth, whether or not I succeeded in this deception.
It
was only when I became completely fenced-in, and in this condition, I saw the
actual need for a power greater than my own efforts. I didn’t come to this
spiritual conversion out of any specific need to be righteous or to live a moral
and better life because I had no desire or compulsion to become a “productive member of
society”. I realized that I was defeated and I simply emptied my heart out to be free of suffering and this was the sort of prayer that was finally answered. The Spirit of Compassion give me the strength to climb and guides me around the stumbling blocks along the way.
geo, 4,687
No comments:
Post a Comment